Saturday, January 29, 2005

Screw u!!*stares fiercely at the screen*bloody hell..what an idiot..bloody idiot..the phone is already spoiled when he gave me yet now he's accusin mi left rite upside down for spoiling it..not enuf,he's accusin 'my friends' that i borrowed it to them n they spoiled it..hello,blame yourself..fucking screw u..wat the hell...

when i read the papers last time abt Leann Rimes suing her dad for money..i couldnt fathom y n how the blood ties get so bad over money n stuff..now i sort of understood..SOME dads are losers..weak,pathetic bloody losers..no,i hope not ALL..somewhere out there,hopefully there are dads who are Responsible n stuff..but MOST think they can protect the world n family by goin out to work n get the money home..wat money..no shit but his own shit he brought home..n spilled it on the rest of us who 'needs' his money ..wake up lar,we dont want money..we want him to be there n to know that somewhere in his small pathetic heart, that he cares for the family..jerk~!I'm seeing red..bloody pissed off from the moment he CAME home tonite..wats the pt of comin home if he's juz gonna make us boilin mad at his DUMBNess n false accusations ..so dumb..

Came home n ask mi abt Parents day letter that arrived..he asked mi wat is it abt..i had no idea DUH..the lecturers havent said anythin wat,its juz A LETTER that came from the mail..FINE,parents day..not my day,crap..so i said the truth la;'i dunno'..then he went, 'yah, u dunno..everythin also u dunno.ur school u dunno..dun think u noe wat u studyin also..'SCREW U..so wat i dun make it to the U..does that make me a LESSER human being or a child in his eyes?..so now wat,he's lookin down on mi coz of that!!bloody hell..think i dunno isit..i screwed up my life for him n now i'm payin for it n he dun even give a damn..ok fine,jc life wasnt that screwed,i enjoyed it but still i wasted 2 years coz i didnt make it..juz coz of an 'E' in the cert..fine,i took that back..but still i went to the jc for him n our relationship soured from then on that he even refused to come for the year 2 Parents-teachers meeting 2years ago..my brother had to take his place..forget it la,in his mind,i'm a DISAPPOINTMENT..go have another CHILD then..oh,i forgot..cannot coz later end up like my sis how..Damn DUMB!

AFter that insinuation, i went off downstairs with Mum to cool down..went to brother's place to have some FUN that i cant get at home with HIM around..its enuf he's acting like a spoiled brat n accusin my nieces/nephews for spoiling the stuff around the house to my mum yesterday..now he's out for my throat when i was juz sittin there watchin tv..wth...reached home abt 12plus n he's still sittin there..

by then,i had forgotten my anger wif him n jokingly told him he gave mi a spoiled phone..n THEN he started again..Accusing me what I had done to the phone when i've been takin gd care of it..Accusing me of SPOILING everything that i have..screw HIM..told him NICELY the phone was already spoiled when he gave me, n like the spoiled selfish brat, he rebutted la..said it was my own fault for spoiling when i DIDNT even spoil it..i didnt drop,drown or even lose it..heck,i took care of it better than my own phone(WHICH I PAID FOR WITH MY OWN MONEY N HE HAPPILY TRADED IT FOR A BRAND NEW PHONE OF HIS OWN!!)..but WHAT is the damn pt when in the end it boils down to this la-the 'assumed conclusion' i 'spoiled' the phone in some way somehow!..bloody hell..Unhappy already that he cant find anythin Concrete to accuse me,he asked mi to take the phone for servicing..did he mention money..no of course not..it is ASSUMED i'll come out wif it on my own..or maybe wif my mum's money la..SCREW HIM!tis is so ridiculous..

SO ridiculous i shall let it slide as usual..he's askin mi to grow up,i'm waitin for him to GROW up all these years..pls la,everything also he believed from his friends not us..right or wrong he takes it from his friends POV..not us..who's the childish one again ar...something gets spoiled,who's the first to react n throw the blames anyhow around..worse,he threw the blames at little kids a.k.a my nephews n nieces.."-.-..he went to bed liaoz to sulk lor..WHO"S THE CHILDISH ONE again..*stares angrily at the screen*..childish idiot..i'm sori i'm sayin tis abt my dad..sorri dad,but u deserved it..>.<~


Siti Nuraishah :+: Landed On :+: Saturday, January 29, 2005

12th October 1985